Why Hospice?

During my first Volunteer Training program, everyone in the room was asked to tell why he/she chose hospice as the place to volunteer. I can't remember anyone deviating too far from the response, "I want to give back" or "I want to help others." Me, too. However, over the years, I've thought about that question a lot. I've come to realize that it's a rare case indeed when the giver continues to give without getting something in return. The question for me then became, "What am I taking away from this experience that keeps me coming back?" I mean, why not Goodwill or the Salvation Army, or working with children or animals? Why the dying?

I decided that in addition to all the surface reasons - hoping to relieve suffering, lessen anxiety -for me, the underlying reason I was drawn to hospice was to make sense of the dying process, to come to terms with it before I was forced to come to terms with it. I don't want to be afraid to die and I would probably never have realized this had I not gone through my mother's death about 8 or 9 years into my volunteer experience. It was revelatory to discover that, despite her strong religious beliefs, it turned out she was scared. Death isn't necessarily just an avoidance of physical pain and it doesn't just affect the person who's dying. Subjectively, I knew this, but it's a whole new ballgame when it's one of your own.

So who knows? My perspective may change again before I'm done but delving a little deeper has made my experiences a little richer.